I am
Kind
Wise
Healthy
Fortunate
Lovable
and
Good.
Think that's a load of horseshit? I get it. I came up with that affirmation on a day I was feeling Bitter, Dumb, Unable, Unlucky, Unwanted, and Evil, and I thought it was horseshit, too.
Like you, I decided a long time ago that I would like to acquire and possess such lovely qualities, replace the bad ones with the good. Once I stepped onto a genuine path toward them, I began running into obstacles, i.e., beliefs and behaviors traceable to some trauma or other in this lifetime that obscure the fact that the lovely things are inherently present if not accounted for, true if not realized, and that to varying degrees, we are "just" devastatingly dissociated from them.
I'm not peddling horseshit about affirming your way into awareness and enjoyment of the lovely qualities. Not gonna happen. If you genuinely long for them, you will get to meet the pain of decades, generations, and lifetimes of their apparent lack. You will get to approach a maddening blindspot wherein the lovely qualities abide and elude you. You will get to look directly at negative cycles of emotion and experience that seem to prove you're exempt from them.
You'll get to reframe the signs and symptoms you called me about, the sadness anger fear and all things diagnosable, as evidence that your goodness is alive and well and punching you in the face, tragically repeatedly unrecognized. Then may there be surrender and gratitude about your situation, hopeless determination for the lovely qualities cultivatable therein, and relentlessly expanding compassion for all beings who suffer like we do.